Today is the 4th anniversary of Hannah's memorial service. In a way that date hits me as much as December 20th.
In some ways it's harder, since I don't remember the 20th at all and can't even pinpoint the day or time when I realized she had died -- I was in such a fog from my own injuries. But the memorial service was the day when I could no longer pretend that it hadn't happened; we were there with probably close to 300 other people for the express purpose of acknowledging her death. I put it off as long as I could, but we ultimately had to do it.
And another quirky thing that's bothering me is that on February 10, Emily will have lived longer than Hannah did -- Hannah was 5 yrs, 8mo and 3 days when she died. I obviously want Emily to live a long happy life, but it is another way that it feels we're leaving Hannah behind, and that hurts too.
2 comments:
I knew that Emily was coming up on Hannah's age. I suspected that would be a really tough milestone for you. Please know that I still think of Hannah and the rest of your family daily.
My heart hurts for you. If you need to talk or just hang out or anything, I'm here. You're in my prayers tonight.
Lisa
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