So, let's see...
1. Preschool went from bad to worse. Emily cried more every day, until this past Monday when she started crying when I turned the corner to go down the street to the school -- up til then she'd at least been happy when she got there. A lot of long boring conversations with her teacher later, we decide to pull her out, although her teacher feels like we should try again in Nov. or Dec.
I desperately want her to have the academic advantages of the Montessori curriculum but don't think the class structure really works for Emily's personality, and I have some deep problems with the parent board of the school (long boring story which I'll spare you).
So instead, my plan is to put her into a more "traditional" preschool (lots of group activity, circle time, more play-based, and only 2 days/week, with a smaller class), see how that goes, and then maybe, but probably not, reconsider Montessori next fall when she's 4. Getting her out of there was a huge relief.
2. I was able to switch meds -- I'm now on Lexapro -- and the difference is incredible. Not that I'm exactly happy, but I'm no longer constantly angry/irritated/impatient/wanting to die. I am patient with Emily and I can cope with life in general, which frees up energy to deal with the stuff that needs to be dealt with in other areas.
3. All 3 of us have had colds -- Emily first, then me, and now Jon.
4. Had bloodwork re-checked, as followup from June. My cholesterol is HIGHER, and apparently my thyroid is on the outs. What the fuck? How did I become middle aged all of a sudden? I really don't understand the cholesterol thing especially, because we've made a really good effort with our diet, but apparently not good enough. I haven't been exercising, since about mid-August, and I've been completely stressed/depressed/burned out, which I can't help but think has something to do with why my body is starting to function less well.
The thyroid thing is weird, too. I do know women tend to have problems with this more than men, especially after having children, but I wonder what effects diet, stress, exercise or other factors might have in it as well?
I hate that all my medical care is so fragmented -- the primary care doc doesn't talk to the midwife doesn't talk to the therapist, although the therapist at least works with the psychiatrist.
Also, when I was given the bad news about my cholesterol, they recommended "dietary changes". I asked them if they could be more specific and they said, "Well, there's Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, etc."
I pointed out that in theory I could eat my allotted calories/points/whatever all in hamburgers, bacon or cheese, which would still cause me to lose weight if I kept within my allotment but would probably kill me rapidly in terms of cardiovascular health.
I asked if they could possibly refer me to a nutritionist -- I may be a foodie, and well-versed in nutrition, but what I need help with is the practical aspect of putting together a new way of eating, factoring in what I like, what's good vs. bad for me, and my diminished energy and time for cooking.
I'm sure you can guess -- insurance doesn't pay for a nutritionist. Perish the thought! However, if I do have a heart attack and become a candidate for quintuple bypass, they'll cough it right up (after some amount of paperwork and phone calls). Never mind that several sessions of nutritional counseling do not even begin to approach a fraction of the cost of a bypass operation and acute cardiac care. What the fuck? How fucked up is that?
5. I'm very slowly, but surely, going through all of our file cabinets/boxes of papers/junk and sorting things out, and finding some cool stuff -- cartoons and sketches of mine, other art projects, stuff from the past (my hospital invoice from delivering Hannah, for example). It's fun and therapeutic, but my time is limited right now since all my morning free time got hosed with the Montessori debacle, and I'm not sure yet how the other school will work out.
Not much else interesting (not that the preceding was actually interesting) to report. My sinuses are doing terrible things right now, so I'll sign off.
